An old work friend is plucking my last nerve. His lack of humility and inflated opinion of himself are driving me crazy. We used to work with each other before we lost our jobs during a downsizing in October of last year. I was able to find another job pretty quick, but he’s still looking. He’s told me he has gotten some initial interviews, but nothing beyond that. He texts and calls me complaining about his situation and asking for job leads. And because we’re friends on Facebook, I’ve seen quite a few of his rants about his job hunt. I used to think his inability to land a job would make him more humble. Instead, he’s gotten worse. He’s so bitter and blames his situation on everyone and everything except himself. I also think his Facebook posts can hurt him if any potential employer sees them. I was able to tolerate his arrogance when we worked together, probably because we shared common issues concerning our boss and some of our co-workers. Now, I’m at the end of my rope. He needs a good talking to, but I don’t know if he will take it the way it would be intended. Should I say something or keep quiet?
Former co-worker needs to change
Dear Former co-worker needs to change:
Only you can determine whether or not having a frank, thoughtful talk with your former co-worker would be worthwhile. As you indicated, there is a good chance your constructive criticism and suggestions will fall on deaf or defensive ears. It is a shame his unsuccessful job search has not made him do a self-assessment and realize he could and should make some changes with his attitude and behavior.
You also mentioned that this guy has complained about his job search on Facebook. Social media in relation to the workplace often sparks heated debates. Whether or not one thinks it is fair or the right thing to do, hiring managers, HR personnel, and the like regularly conduct Internet searches on job candidates. Consequently, one should refrain from making any negative and/or dismissive comments about employers and/or the job hunt process in social media forums.
© 2014 Rozanne R. Worrell